A Sailor Scout In Training

Okay, I know the title is ridiculous. Heck, this whole blog is probably ridiculous, but I'm losing my mind slowly. One of the best things I had at Hume was my journal. It was my best friend most of the time, something I could go to when I need to vent or express myself. It was also something I could look back on. Recently, I looked at some of the entries and I slowly saw the growth that took place. I liked being able to read an entry and feel like I'm there again. Because of my journal, I know exactly how I was feeling and it makes it all seem more real.

Anywho, I decided that being a "Sailor Scout In Training" would be my basic theme for this blog (thus the name SailorD, short for Sailor Star Defender). Although for some people this seems childish and ridiculous, I see it with all seriousness. For me, Sailor Moon is a character that closely resembles a Warrior of God. She fights for Love and Justice. She never leaves anyone behind. She has a crystal heart that can be seen by everyone. And, my favorite part, she's human. She makes mistakes, but repents immediately (okay, by the end of each episode). Point being, I want to be a Scout like her. I want to honor God by striving to be the best Warrior/Princess/Daughter I can be. I haven't been that, and I know this.

Lesson one of being a Scout: Be selfless. All the scouts at some point are willing to lay their lives down for one another. They selflessly sacrifice everything for the greater good, and for each other. So why do I have such a hard time with this? Is my heart so selfish that I can't give up what I want to glorify God? Or is it that I just have trust issues? Probably both. I'll talk about trust later. God clearly commands us to be selfless and love one another (Philippians 4:2, Luke 6:35). But what does it look like to be completely selfless? I feel like the the obvious answer is Jesus. I mean, look at what he did to show us love! Gah, I still can't even get over what He did. Whenever I truly think about Jesus's selfless act I think, "Wow." That's all I can think. Words can't describe! Even in sign language, all I can sign is "Amazing." As a Scout, I know it will take time to get there. In the first episode of Sailor Moon, Usagi (Serena) says, "I WANT TO GO HOME!" in the middle of the fight. And then we see this amazing transformation when she throws herself into battle time and time again. It will take time, my hope is I will look back on these blog entries, smile, and see growth.

Abba, Father, show me how to be selfless like you. My heart is wicked and it only wants to benefit my selfish desires. Come into my heart again, Lord, and make it clean. Your servant is listening. Here I am. Amen.

With Lots of Love,

 ~SailorD