Sacrifice

Lesson 25: Love is sacrifice.

I think I may have skimmed the surface of this topic before, but I've decided to make this a whole post.  I don't know why, but this topic has really been getting under my skin lately.  Okay, maybe I should rephrase.  People have been getting under my skin recently.  These people get under my skin because they don't understand this concept, or they don't practice it.  I know I myself have not always practiced the concept that "Love is Sacrifice," but I'd like to think that I'm at least at the intermediate level on this.  I don't know, maybe I need to reread my Humility post haha.

Anywho, there are some people in my life and other people who've I've just recently met who don't get this concept and it genuinely bothers me.  They say things like, "OMG. I LOVE HIM. HE MAKES ME FEEEEEEL SOOOO GOOD."  To that I say, "Pipe the F*** down" (Haha, Jenna Marbles reference...yeah.) But seriously, get a grip.  If you "love" this person because he makes you "feel" good, it's not love.  Sure, feeling good can come with love.  But if you do that, then you're basing the relationship on emotions and feelings.  That's not healthy and it won't last.  It's not sacrificial or unconditional love in any way shape or form.  If I based my current relationship on how good he makes me feel, it wouldn't be a very good one.  I will admit, there are days when he doesn't make me "feel good," but does that mean I love him any less?  Of course not.  (Sorry babe if you're reading this, but you're not perfect.  But it's okay, cause neither am I.  Our God is and that's all that matters!)  I realized through our tough times that I did not practice this sacrificial and unconditional love and that's ultimately what lead to the separation.  Not to say it was all my fault, but you get the idea.  I realized through all the crap I put him through that I was not loving him unconditionally as he was/is.  And I sure as heck wasn't sacrificial.  Even through the tough times he told me, "I don't care about what you've done or what you feel, I still love you." (paraphrased)

I guess that's why I see people now who do this and I just cringe.  I recently met someone who is in a relationship.  Loving woman of God, but man... she is on a path of destruction.  Only been dating this guy for a month or two (maybe 3, not sure) and claims to love him.  Which, okay, I guess that's possible.  But then the next day she comes and complains about something he did and says he's stupid, he's inconsiderate, etc.  Then the next day they make up and the cycle repeats.  During those times when he's being "insert insult", she's clearly not loving him.  I get it if you need to rant every now and then, BUT COME ON. If you can't even go a week without putting conditions and expectations on your significant other, you don't deserve one.  Period.

Same goes for friendships.  I've had a lot of friends who don't sacrifice, and frankly those ones aren't ones worth keeping.  Coming to someone when it's convenient for you is not okay.  I get it.  People get busy, and schedules conflict.  But at least TRY.  Key word: try.  If you at least try, I know you're genuinely making an effort and sacrificing your time.  If you're in a friendship because you "have fun with them" or "they make you feel happy", etc, etc, then how is that a friendship?  People disappoint.  Simple truth.  I will disappoint people, others will disappoint me too.  But does that mean you just give up?  Not if you truly care for that person.

Wow.  I totally just realized that this just turned into a rant post.  My bad.  If you've read that far, congrats on enduring that!  But seriously, if you're in a relationship or whatever, just hear my plea and evaluate yourself.  Do you love this person because you "feel good" or because you choose daily to love him/her?  Love is a choice and an action.  If you're basing love off of feelings, you're not truly loving.  Heck, if Jesus based love off of his feelings, He wouldn't have died for us!!! Do you think he felt like going to the cross?  No, he choose to sacrifice because He chooses to love us unconditionally.  Wow.

With Lots of Love,

~SSD (Alyssa)